Wyoming Jack Hello boys

Wyoming Jack the saloon

Background
So far Jack and the guys have been rodeoing, fighting, had a wolf pack attack, suffered through a blizzard, stalked by a mountain lion, and now they meet up with THE “RED HEAD”

Jack and the guys headed for the Cattlemen’s Hotel and a well earned bath and shave. Not only did they look like death warmed over, but they dang well smelled like it too.

J was first into the bath tub as Anna Belle, the bath attendant, brought him a beer the size of a coffee pot. J loves beer almost as much as he did women. As she handed him the beer, he pulled her into the tub.

Now this weren’t the first yahoo who had done this, but to make it seem bigger than it was she dumped the beer over J’s head. All J could do was lick the beer as it drizzled down his head and into the tub and by accident pulled her top off revealing her ample bosoms to the delight of all the men in the room. Anna Belle took to scrubbing J in all the right places and when she finished, said to him, “Now get upstairs with ya and we’ll massage that stupid grin from yer face.”

Jay gladly let her dry him off, and her and J’s shit eaten grin disappeared up the stairs.

After that well needed bath and shave, Jack, Vard, and Orville wanted a thick steak, some ice cold beer, and perhaps a card game or even set up singing like they truly loved to do.

Now the Cattlemen’s was a high class place once you got past the bath house and Anna Belle’s charms.

The three men sat down at a table spread like the President was gonna eat there. There were three forks, two spoons, a steak knife, as well as a butter knife. Not only that but it had cloth napkins which the men promptly tucked down the front of their necks and motioned the waiter for coffee and lots of it.

Now Cookie was a fair cook, but these here city fellers had him whooped hands down.

First they brung a bowl of soup, then a salad, two plates of dinner rolls like their mom used to make. When the steaks came, they were the size of the plate. Another plate held the taters and gravy, some cooked green beans with strips of bacon, and dadgummit it were plum delicious. When they finished with the main course, then they brung a cart full of pies and cakes. Vard had to have some of each one and whooped, “Each one tasted betteren the last one.”

Finally through with dinner, they lit a cigar, bellied up to the bar, and ordered a tall mug of cold beer to wash it all down.

Now it was then when the first polecat smacked Jack along side the head with a chair knocking him to the floor. He could feel blood oozing down the side of his face as he looked up in time to see Vard go flying across the room with Orville following him in a like fashion.

“Hello boys,” said the big Swede from the Cheyenne Days rodeo that the boys had whopped him and his twin brother. Cepten now they had the rangiest looking red headed Swedish women they had ever seen. She was the one who had hit Jack with the chair. That woman had blood in her eyes as she let out a war hoop and said, “Yew boys beat up my two sons in Cheyenne and tonight we’re a fixen to even the score. Now get off yer asses and take yer punishment like men.”

“Now hold on there lady,” yelled Jack as he got up off the floor. “I aint never hit a lady and I aint about to start tonight. Let’s sit down and have a drink and see if we can work this out.”

“Why yew damn lop-eared galoot, I aint no lady and yer gonna pay fer the licken you gave my twins. Now put em up and take it like a man.”

With that she pulled out the biggest damn knife Jack had ever seed and came at him like she was fixen to kill rattle snakes. Jack sidestepped her and kicked her in the backside knocking her to the floor.

“Now stay there dammit. Your boys agreed that they lost the fight fair and square and we had a drink on it. I swear mam if’en you get up I’m gonna kick your ass so hard it’ll knock you clear into next week and then I’m gonna kick your boys asses over their shoulders so as in order to talk, they’ll have to unzip their pants. Now quit before you really make me mad.”

Vard got up laughing at the idea of the boys having to unzip their pants to speak, as did the boys.

“Aw mudder, get up and let’s get drunk with these here boys. You got im good in the head with that chair. He’s stopped bleeden so he aint too mad are ya, mister Jack? Whadda ya say mudder, let’s get rip roaren drunk with these knot heads?”

Orville said, “I’ll go grab the instruments Jack. Wipe yourself off; we’re fixen to make some noise. He he he she nearly knocked your block off. I’ll be right back.”

About that time, J came down the stairs still wearen that shit eaten grin and laughing like a hyena in heat. From then on it was drink and sing and watch the red head dance with whatever dared get close enough for her to corral him. When morning came, they were all passed out across the room, and Anna Belle and the red head helped each one to their room. Big red took an fancy to J!

The book continues with Part 8 – THE OCCIDENTAL SALOON.

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